Some books are friendly advisers on how to do things better or with more style.
Searching on amazon, I found Jennifer L. Scott’s “MADAME CHIC” books. There are 3 of them, written by a former exchange student to France who came to a family of aristocratic, very traditional people living in the centre of Paris. Whilst others might have had difficulties adjusting to their rigid lifestyle, it seems to have been a revelation to Jennifer L. Scott.
She adopted the strict rules Madame Chic (the name she uses in her books for her host) taught her about how to be presentable in your daily life, always well groomed and doing your daily duties without complaining. Even more, to like your daily duties.
This is not the way of life people today think they are entitled to. A “Money for nothing and your chicks for free” lifestyle, that the band Dire Straits sung about, seems what some people think to be their birthright. One gets the feeling duties are often complained about, as if everything is supposed to make our life more comfortable. No, it is no-one’s duty to make your life more comfortable, and you have no right to anything for free, that is the simple truth.
The old values Jennifer L. Scott celebrates are values of getting things done and seriousness without complaint. She advises to like one’s duties, because that makes life much easier. Without naming the word, she was an early advocate what today’s resilience movement cherishes.
The books were written in 2011, 2014 and 2015. By now, Jennifer L. Scott runs a successful business with her blog “The Daily Connoisseur”. In the beginning, though, it seems she had problems finding a publisher for her books. This becomes clear from the acid comments of some early reviewers, who hated the book for its messages and used the self-publishing of the books as a sign for their mediocracy.
Being reminded to show some discipline is not something en vogue today. But it is necessary. The “MADAME CHIC” books transport partly the same message as the Italian concept of Bella Figura. Make the best out of you every day of your life and do not wait for some special something to happen. To most people nothing special happens, there is no higher sense in their life than living as well as they can, to care for their family and friends, and behave like a decent person in general. Few of us become celebrities or save the world. We live just a normal life, which is wonderful.
I loved the books immediately and the mindset they were written in.
Many years back I read a quote by a chancellor from my country in the 1800s, stating:” Man is not in the world to be happy, but to fulfil his duty”. That statement is too hard, that is for sure. It sounds like something that in dark times religions or totalitarian states asked of their people, and never to the advantage of the people. Today we live in better times, full of freedom and possibilities. It is refreshing to read to get on with your life, to do your work as good as you can and not to think you are a hero just because you do not complain 24/7.
In short, all 3 books give the message to make the best out of every new day:
To be happy where you are and what you are
To like your (daily) chores and duties and see them positive
To care of yourself and your family
To be presentable, always
To work diligently, be it as a housewife or a professional in a paid job
To organize yourself and help those around you to do it
To not hoard clothes or other items
The advice is not rocket-science, but it helps to improve your own state of mind. To expect praise for everything is not increasing your probability of a happy and content life.
Of course, there is no need to live exactly according to the book.
To pick something out that angered quite a few commentors: She wrote that one should wear one’s good clothes also at home when being alone. When you work outside the house in a professional job, you probably want to make a mental cut when you come home and change your cloths. It is not sloppiness to do so. On the other hand, one can fully appreciate Jennifer L. Scott’s advice for stay-at-home parents or – newer – people working from home.
There must be a differentiation between time to work and time to relax. As we saw during the Corona pandemic, not everyone got the concept right directly. Unshaved guys in badly cut (and more than once worn) t-shirts had to understand first that work was still work. Women with unwashed hair and in sleep shirts needed to understand that, yes, one could see their attire on the screen! And camera off is not an option in general. How comfortable it might be, you cannot have a business meeting and hope to be taken seriously whilst looking like a tramp.
When you are a stay-at-home mum, there is no one to tell you so – except maybe Jennifer L. Scott. Raising a family is as much, or more, work than working outside the house. As a matter of self-respect, do not look like someone who does not take himself/herself seriously. Madame Chic taught Jennifer L. Scott that rules and discipline do come at a price, but are also rewarding.
Never let yourself down, is the message of the books, even if you think you are not making a difference. You are someone and you always make a difference, even if you are not aware of it. People see you and might be inspired, which gives hope.
All rights to the books belong to:
Scott, Jennifer L.: Lessons from MADAME CHIC, 20 Stylish Secrets I Learned while Living in Paris, 2011, published by Simon & Schuster, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020, manufactured in the United States, ISBN: 978-1-4516-9937-1
Scott, Jennifer L.: At Home with MADAME CHIC, Becoming a Connoisseur of Daily Life, 2014, published by Simon & Schuster, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020, manufactured in the United States, ISBN: 978-1-4767-7033-8
Scott, Jennifer L.: Polish Your Poise with MADAME CHIC, Lessons in Everyday Elegance, 2015, published by Simon & Schuster, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020, manufactured in the United States, ISBN: 978-1-5011-1873-9
For Jennifer L. Scott’s channel “The Daily Connoisseur” go to youtube. Some of the videos are for free. I recommend to read the books, being not a fan of long videos or podcasts.